Published on October 25th, 2017
Cheating can unleash devastating consequences on a couple and is oft-cited as the ultimate deal breaker, beating out both emotional unavailability and physical abuse. Yet over half of married couples decide to weather the damage together rather than split up.
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In this post we discuss on different ways that a guy can get his girlfriend back after a break up. The exact approach that you need to use to get your girlfriend back will depend on what stage of the break up process you are in and how bad the break up was.
1. Honesty First
In the wake of discovering infidelity, Spring asks the wronged party to detail their grievances to their partner by articulating an unsparing and emotionally raw declaration.
2. Bearing Witness
Just as importantly, the adulterous partner must be prepared to face the heartache that their infidelity has wrought. Many unfaithful individuals feel paralyzed with guilt; they see the affair as irreparable damage.
3. A Written Apology
After the adulterer has listened openly and understandingly to their partner’s declaration, Spring suggests that the cheater paraphrase the account in their own words. Spring then suggests that they write out a detailed, specific letter to prove they understand the sorrow they’ve caused.
4. Avoid Cheap Forgiveness
Sometimes the desire to salvage the relationship (and on the flip side, the fear of losing a partner) overwhelms the necessity to vent anger, and wronged partners forgive before they’ve had a chance to seethe.
5. Sharing Responsibility
Even in relationships where only one person has strayed, oftentimes both members bear the blame for an affair. Spring acknowledges that the unfaithful person must own up to 100% of their guilt, but the wronged party must also acknowledge their own role in fostering an unhappy union, however minuscule.
6. Setting Rules
“There are specific ways to earn and grant trust in order to allow the relationship to recover,” Spring advises. She suggests that the couple establish ironclad, non-negotiable rules at the beginning of the healing process.
7. Redefine Sexual Intimacy
One of the greatest hurdles in the healing process lies between the sheets. “Often, a couple feels like the other person is sitting in between them, like a ghost, and that conception strains sex,” Spring says.
8. Ignore the Aphorisms
Though conventional wisdom has posited the phrase, “once a cheater, always a cheater,” Spring balks at this advice. “That’s a very dangerous assumption. So many adulterous people have come to me because they’re ambivalent about what they’ve done, or because they want to know how to stop.
9. Reality Check
In the aftermath of cheating, it’s easy to feel as if your relationship is uniquely dysfunctional, yet the majority of long-term couples undergo at least one instance of infidelity.
10. Letting Go
Remember the rigid stipulations that Spring suggested in Step #5? Those only work if the wronged person gradually loosens the tight leash as their pain fades and trust grows over time.
11. Redefine the relationship and start again
Sometimes a relationship will break up because the man and woman simply don’t know how to make each other feel how they really want to feel when in a relationship. This may happen if a guy is inexperienced with relationships, if he takes his woman for granted or if he just wasn’t ready to be the type of man that she really needs.
12. Make her feel jealous by enjoying your life without her.
Making a woman feel jealous isn’t the only thing that you need to do to get her back, but it’s something that helps bring down her guard and make her feel compelled to stay in contact with you.
13. Get her to have sex with you one last time.
A great way to get your girlfriend back after a break up is to get her to agree to have sex one last time. If you have also improved and fixed some of the issues that caused the break up and you are able to make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you when you meet up with her, the sex will be the enjoyable icing on top of the cake.
14. Stop texting her and only be available via phone call or meet up.
A lot of guys delay the process of getting a woman back by allowing her to access to text him back and forth whenever she feels like it. If you want to make her feel some loss and be willing to talk to you on the phone, you’ve got to cut off her access to text communication with you.
15. Only display traits that will attract her and make her feel respectful of you.
Some guys make the mistake of thinking that they might be able to get another chance with their ex girlfriend by making her feel guilty or making her feel pity for him. For example: He will slip into begging, pleading, promising her the world if she gives him another chance, declaring his undying love for her, threatening to kill himself, saying that he is nothing without her and so on.
Let’s find out what other people have to say about How To Renew A Relationship After A Breakup on Quora :
It depends on how the break up occurred. Cheating is “stupid” but the “how” to fix a break up after betrayal could depend on the details (was there promo graphic picture of yoh and your affair posted on your girlfriend’s social media? Read more here… By Elbert Lee
Relationships end for all kinds of reasons. Sometimes thise reasons are stupid. But it isn’t up to you to “fix” anything. Relations. hips involve at least two people. Each of those people has veto power to end the relationship at any time for any reason. Read more here… By Joel David Woren
When you are annoyed but don’t directly say it, you can’t expect him to know. When you are being passive aggressive instead of not explaining why you’re being reserved, he can respond in a way that would make it worse because he has no idea what’s going on. Read more here… By Astrid Escargot
Most people don’t breakup with their significant other for first time infractions unless it’s something really serious like cheating or abuse. Read more here… By Chris Tion
Fix isn’t the right word. You broke up. Your relationship has ended. You want a new relationship with the same person. This means starting over. The problem is that you’re not starting over from scratch. Read more here… By Carole Unter
Watch 7 Ways to Bring The Spark Back In A Relationship