Relationships

5 Reasons You Need To Try Harder If You’re Single

You show love every single day

June 9th, 2018   |   Updated on February 28th, 2023

Assuming you’ve been alone for some time but are keen to remedy this situation, you might have experienced disappointment when your phone stays silent following any dates you’ve been on.

Perhaps you’ve begun questioning if you have character flaws you’ve never been aware of, but which each date has tactfully decided not to point out to you.

The good news is it should be relatively easy to find single women who will be keen to see you time and again, provided you follow some basic ground rules. Here are five reasons you need to be trying harder.

1. Play it cool

When you are single but hoping to get into a relationship, the worst thing you can do is give the impression of desperation. Just because you haven’t had much luck up until this point is no reason to over-compensate by fretting when it comes to making arrangements.

When you do invite your prospective partner out for a date, try not to make it appear obvious you are doing everything in your power to impress them. Instead of thinking of boastful comments or talking about impressive-sounding ambitions, just keep things natural.

Although it might seem like a tall order at the time, do your best to appear calm and collected. If you come across as nervous and excitable teenager on their first date, not only will you put undue pressure on yourself to perform to a certain standard, there is every chance your date will begin questioning if there are deeper reasons you have been single for this length of time.

2. Aspirations

 

Think of the attributes you are looking for in a potential companion. Now give them a critical appraisal and decide if your aspirations are grounded and achievable or simply too good to be true.

Instead of chasing after pipe dreams it would make far more sense to go with the flow and take every new date as it comes; if you are on the cusp of something potentially exciting. Rather than aspiring to what is effectively wishful thinking, focus on what you can actually influence.

3. On the rebound

As well as considering the type of relationship you are seeking, it would be worth thinking about why this is the case. In many instances people remain single for some time because they’ve been hurt in a previous relationship and are reluctant to commit to another.

If this is your mindset you are liable to remain on the rebound indefinitely, bouncing from one unsatisfactory relationship to another, condemned to perpetually copare the present with the past.

But this is a very unfair comparison and the sooner you accept your future happiness depends on your ability to move on, the better for your love life.

4. Expectations

Everyone has ambitions about what they will achieve when they eventually get to know someone well and the chemistry sparkles. Your most recommended course of action for guaranteeing fulfilment and happiness is to leave expectations behind.

Treat each day as it comes rather than continually building yourself up or preparing to be knocked down. If you can approach each date in a relaxed and positive way, you will not risk damaging your self-esteem.

5. Fate

Lastly, never rely on fate. There is nothing pre-ordained in this world, especially the likelihood of you discovering the love of your life around the corner or inside the next online chat room.

You are the master of your own destiny and the sooner you accept this and have the confidence to act upon it, the better your chance of achieving satisfaction.