Deal With Depression

How To Deal With Depression After Divorce And Separation

October 10th, 2020   |   Updated on June 24th, 2022

Divorce is usually accompanied by negative feelings which include fear, loneliness, shame, and sadness. If care is not taken, all these factors combined lead to depression.

Depression, in this case, is a form of illness caused by negative factors that react in a reverse manner to how the human mind ought to behave. It is a medical illness which is caused by thinking a lot and having no hope for the future.

Post-divorce depression is the number two factor that causes unbearable pain from death. When a couple thinks of how they would part ways and live independently, this becomes a mental health challenge.

The thought of living someone whom you have spent the better part of your lives together becomes unbearable. When these thoughts come along in one’s mind, depression starts being a life-threatening situation.

There might be some people who think that depression after divorce is not real and take it as sheer nonsense. But this isn’t the real picture in life.

Some Causes Of Depression After A Divorce Are :

  1. Childcare – Your children are the number one priority when it comes to possessions. Women are mostly affected because of the maternal attachment they hold with the children, and this may put them down for fear of their future.
  2. Social Interactions – Mostly, women tend to build social lives more than men. While together, they bring extended families, friends from both sides to have a common goal. But as soon as they separate, the social gatherings decline, a friend’s part ways and the joy of sharing fades away. This ends up becoming a nightmare and loneliness steps in.
  3. Income gaps – When the couple is together, the income tends to be used in a more thought of a way, thereby consolidating the household expenses. But when separation sets in, the income disintegrates, and the cost of taking care of two houses becomes an uphill task. This, too, often leads to depression.

Post-divorce depression is real, and people may think that this is something that one can quickly get out from. But this is not the reality. There has to be a road to divorce recovery which should not be taken for granted.

With all this said, there are several ways in which psychologists and therapists have come up with, which help divorced and separated couples to deal with depression. It helps to consider that life must move on even though the circumstances look challenging.

1. Manage Any Negative Thoughts And Emotions.


While alone and flooded with a million thoughts which in this case are negative, depression becomes a reality. It’s therefore paramount to take care of the emotions and change the attitude in mind, to focus on the great and mind building thoughts.

Do not allow the negative emotions to take a toll on your life and do all you could to suppress such feelings. Here is more info about managing negative emotions.

It’s always essential to have a special meeting alone and ask yourself several questions. For instance, what would I do better alone and cope with the situation I am in?

If being employed can make you happy and keep the mind busy, then this would be a perfect option rather than staying indoors alone the whole day and night long.

2. Balancing Life Matters.

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We all have some things that make our lives happy. This is well known as savoring. At one time or another, there is a need to go for that one activity that is refreshing, for instance, going shopping in a mall with a longtime friend, enjoying skiing and having fun around.

After that, one may consider having a cappuccino drink and make yourself happy, and this would help one get relieved in a better way after a break-up.

Another excellent activity is to anticipate and keep your mind looking forward to meeting someone you have agreed to meet after a long time. That anticipation kills the boredom, and the mind becomes active in other more productive and soothing activities than suffering in loneliness.

3. Change Of Routine.

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One couple in a neighborhood divorced, and the lady went through a trying moment because they were working in the same profession as the Ex-husband. Whenever there would be career meetings, they would bounce at each other, and this created more hatred than before.

However, one time, the lady decided to quit her nursing career to become an air hostess. A job that forced her to learn new traits, learn about customer service, and smile at customers. This was a rare encounter in her former career.

Her face all over sudden cleared, the wrinkles faded away, and the new environment brought a fresh glow in her life. This was a good indication that changing a routine was essential to fight depression. And yes, it did well for her.

4. Have A Social Interaction.

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Any time people of like minds surround you, life feels better. For instance, while going through stressful situations, family and friends can act as a catalyst to your healing process. They are people who give you hope for tomorrow while socializing with them.

But taking this in mind, one must also be open enough to get out of your “comfort zone” and in this matter, the loneliness zone. Consider making dates with friends, hang up till late, and enjoy a drink together rather than isolate yourself only to raise the stress levels beyond manageable levels.

In as much as one may not be able to share out the pains with every other person, there is that one trusted a friend or a family person whom you are free to share the private life. These people will support you and with no time to find that you are a happy person, one who is willing to move on with life at ease.

5. Therapy Sessions.

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According to Complete Case, therapy sessions are highly important. Therapy is a form of treatment that helps to relieve or heal a disorder. In this case, depression is a disorder that can make the body get fatigued, and emotions run high. To get through this ordeal, it’s imperative to visit a therapist who will give emotional advice to take life positively and help relieve emotional thoughts.

On the other hand, therapists can initiate a focused physical activity where the body movement can heal the pain that one is going through as a result of depression.

For instance, attending gym sessions which are mixed up with soothing and fun dances. This will clear the sadness than one goes through after a divorce.

As the affected party continues doing this for several sessions, the body and mind adapt to a relaxed environment, and most likely, depression fades away. The positive thoughts engulf any negative feeling to allow for healing in this instance.

6. Writing About The Experience.

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Psychologists might tend to fight with the writing analogy when it comes to managing depression. In some cases, this may not work perfectly well. But some people have been tried and tested in writing of the ordeal they went through in marriage and consequently after divorce whereas this may be a two-way option.

It would hold much weight on healing depression when a divorced person shares out the experiences and clear the mind through writing.

Besides, it would still help people who are facing divorce and becomes a healing process when they read books from people who have heard real-life experience.

On the other hand, always make lemonade when given a lemon. Writing, in this case, would act more of lemonade to heal not only one soul but a thousand out there who are suffering from depression.

Final Thoughts

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It’s important to remember that separation does not belong to a specific group of people.

As such, there ought to be no room to victimize someone who is going through a painful moment.

Keep on encouraging them to see life from a different perspective and remember that there is life after.

Again, nobody can prevent a divorce from taking place, and in case it happens, then let it be. However much one may feel it’s not his or her portion, accept the situation to get a way of healing.

If it means that you got to be sad and depressed, then give time for nature to take cause, but do not dwell on it forever.

When it comes to managing a negative issue in life, it is always a tough decision.

But eventually, things will line up again in the right way and as such, keep your head high and fight depression which will be the way to healing.

If you would like to learn if you may be depressed, consider taking this depression assessment here:

Health Disclaimer :

Information provided by does in no way substitute for qualified medical opinion. Any text, videos or any other material provided by us should be considered as generic information only. Any health related information may vary from person to person, hence we advice you to consult specialists for more information.