70 Funny Valentine Day’s Jokes To Make Him/Her Feel Energetic

Valentine day jokes

February 2nd, 2021   |   Updated on June 27th, 2022

Valentine’s day is a special day to show your love and appreciation for your spouse or significant other. What better way to do that than by telling some funny Valentine’s jokes? Here are some jokes specifically for kids..

Laughter is the best medicine for everyone. An exciting Valentine’s Day card consisting of Valentine’s Day jokes could be the most different gift. Who doesn’t like the jokes? From younger to elders everybody forgets their sorrows after a funny story. One can remember it to the extent of cheerfulness.

Therefore, one can have hilarious jokes as a message to write on the Valentine’s Day card. The list has humorous jokes to write on the card.

Valentine’s Day can be a bit daunting, especially if you’re not sure how to make the day special. But don’t worry, with these hilarious ideas, you’ll be sure to make your loved ones laugh all day long.

The best way to make someone happy on Valentine’s Day is by giving them the gift of laughter. Whether you’re sending a romantic letter or dropping a funny message in your kid’s lunchbox, it’s the perfect way to show them how much you care.

They are labeled according to age. Send these amazing funny Valentine Day’s jokes to make the dear ones feel energetic. There is no need to have a romance and arrangement of a special dates.    

1. “They say that love is blind.” “If that’s true, why is lingerie such a popular Valentine’s Day gift?”

Valentine day jokes

2. “What did the acrobat do on Valentine’s Day?” “He fell head over heels in love.”


3. “Bees love Valentine’s Day.” “They like to tell each other they’re bee-utiful.”


4. “A toy company has a new toy for Valentine’s Day.” “They call it Valenslime.”


5. “How do snakes show their affection on Valentine’s Day?” “With a hug and a hiss.”


6. “What do bats do on Valentine’s Day?” “They hang around.”


7. “What did the bride of Frankenstein say to her lover?” “Frank you for being my friend.”


8. “What did the painter tell his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?” “I love you with all my art.”


9. “A quote from a Valentine’s Day card to a stamp.” “Stick with me and you’ll go places.”


10. “On a hot day, what does one ice cream scoop say to the other?” “You make me melt.”

valentine jokes

11. “What did the paper clip say to the magnet?” “I find you very attractive.”


12. “Why didn’t the skeleton want to send any Valentine’s Day cards?” “His heart wasn’t in it.”


13. “Why did the sheriff lock up their valentine?” “She stole their heart.”


14. “What do you call two birds in love?” “Tweethearts!”


15. “How can you tell when a squirrel is in love?” “It goes nuts!”


16. “I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture. But when I got home the tables were turned.”


17. “I once fell in love with someone who only knew 4 vowels. They didn’t know I existed.”


18. “What did the calculator say to the pencil?” “You can count on me.”


19. “How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?” “He gave her a ring!”


20. “What did one oar tell the other oar?” “This is so row-mantic!”

valentine jokes for adults

21. “What did the light bulb say to the other light bulb?” “You light my world up.”


22. “How can you get arrested on Valentine’s Day?” “For stealing someone’s heart.”


23. “What did one watermelon say to the other?” “You’re one in a melon!”


24. “What do you call a very small Valentine?” “A valen-tiny.”


25. “What did the ghost say to his valentine?” “You look so BOOtiful.”


26. “If he doesn’t appreciate your fruit jokes, you need to let that mango.”


27. “What do farmers give for Valentine’s Day?” “Lots of hogs and kisses.”


28. “What do you call a Valentine’s Day gift that didn’t arrive time?” “Choco-late.”


29. “What did one bee say to the other?” “I love bee-ing with you, honey!”


30. “What did one volcano say to the other?” “I lava you.”

tell me a valentine's day joke

31. “What did one blueberry say to the other on Valentine’s Day?” “I love you berry much.”


32. “What did the cucumber say to the pickle?” “You mean a great dill to me.”


33. “What did one cat say to the other cat on Valentine’s Day?”


34. “You’re purr-fect for me.”


35. “What did one sheep say to the other on February 14?” “I love ewe.”


36. “How much candy do you hope to get this Valentine’s Day?” “A choco-LOT!”


37. “What did one flame say to another on Valentine’s Day?” “We’re a perfect match.”


38. “How did the phone propose to his GF?” “He gave her a ring.”


39. “How did the whale ask the other whale on a Valentine’s date?” “Whale you be mine?”


40. “What do you call a ghost’s sweetheart?” “A ghoul-friend.”

valentines day jokes for adults

41. “Knock knock.” “Who’s there?” “Olive.” “Olive who?” “Olive you!”


42. “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Peas.” “Peas who?” “Peas be mine!”


43. “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Butch, Jimmy and Joe.” “Butch, Jimmy, and Joe who?” “Butch your arms around me, Jimmy a kiss, and let’s Joe.”


44. “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Disguise.” “Disguise who?” “Disguise is your boy friend!”


45. “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Howard.” “Howard who?” “Howard you like a big kiss?”


46. “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Bea.” “Bea who?” “Bea my Valentine!”


47. “What did one canoe say to another canoe?” “You rock my boat.”


48. “What did one drum say to the other drum on Valentine’s Day?” “My heart beats for you.”


49. “You can count on me said the calculator to the pencil on Valentine’s Day.”


50. “What do you call an affectionate dog on Valentine’s Day?” “A Smooch Pooch.”

funny valentine jokes

51. I don’t have a valentine, so I’m going to go eat a box of chocolates by myself.


52. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and I’m diabetic too.


53. My love for you is like a truck, it’s big and strong and hard to stop.


54. If you want to be my lover, you have to get with my friends.


55. I love you like a fat kid loves cake.


56. If you want to make your valentine happy, tie up his/her hands and feet and put him/her in a dark room until further notice.


57. Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty; what the hell happened to you?


58. I love my computer more than I love you.


59. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you—but the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl’s empty and so is your head!


60. If I had a dollar for every time I thought of you, I’d be broke

dirty valentines jokes

61. Roses are red, your face is too, send me some money please!


62. Roses are red, violets are blue, how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?


63. What did the octopus say to the other octopus on Valentine’s Day? I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand.


64. What do you call a romantic ship? A courtship.


65. What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts!


66. What did you say about a late Valentine’s Day gift? It’s choco-late!


67. How did the phone propose? With a ring.


68. “Knock knock.” “Who’s there?” “Bea.” “Bea who?” “Bea mine Valentine!”


69. What do you call a small valentine? Valen-tiny.


70. What did the bartender say to his girlfriend? I love you beer-y much.

corny valentines jokes